A Beginning Post

I can think of no other way to begin this blog than with a song that speaks to what it means to begin.  To begin this idea that I’ve had for more then a while. This beginning of something that, will evolve and change into who knows what, but for today it begins with The Decemberists. Their song “A Beginning Song” off their new album What A Terrible World, What A Beautiful World speaks to what it means to be in a beginning stage. A place of whether to start, to let go, to give up, to wander.

The chorus specifically is what makes this song so poignant. This idea of waiting and wanting, right now is something I have been grappling with for months. For a while I kept thinking that I’ve been in this place of change before. And then I realized, that I’ve never been in this place before, a series of events have made a complete circle around me and I am at a place of so many choices and freedoms that I have become immobilized. At a point where I am restless and ready to begin, I am also afraid. Whether it be in letting go of everything that I know and staying comfortable or to just let go of everything. I’m sure this is a struggle we all face, what is it that makes us begin to think “I’m ready to try something new” “I’m ready to leave”  “I’m ready to begin to write again.” All of these ideas that I talk myself into and out of. I think this song makes me feel less afraid. Its ok to feel so restless that I just need to begin. Its ok to start a blog. Its ok to listen the same Decemberists song over and over. And with that, is how I’m going to begin.